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Health & Fitness

L.A. to Get 400 New Parking Meters

A satirical look at current events!

LA to Get 400 New Parking Meters:  The Los Angeles Times reports that the LA City Council has voted to add more than 400 parking meters to the city's streets in an attempt to boost revenue.  Wow, that LA City Council can really read voter’s minds!  I can hardly think of a single person who doesn’t think that what LA really needs is more parking meters.

Chevy Volt Outselling Corvette:  New data show that so far in 2012, Chevy has offloaded 7,057 Volts, compared to the Corvette’s 5,547 sales.  Analysts say no one should be shocked by the Volt sales figures.

Record Heat in US Recorded:  A new report finds that the past 12 months have been the warmest on record for the mainland United States.  Its been so hot that what little bread I had left in my bank account is now toast.

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US Obesity Rate Growing:  Drawing on new government data, Duke University researchers predict that by the year 2030, the rate of severely obese Americans will have doubled to 11 percent of the population.  Critics say the researchers are nothing but big fat lairs.

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Bright Screens Inhibit Sleep:  U.S. scientists found that exposure to devices with self-luminous "backlit" screens causes melatonin suppression that can lead to sleep problems.  Then how come I always seem to fall asleep while I’m watching TV? 

Posting Friends Pics on Facebook:  A new study says that 25% of women surveyed admitted to posting unflattering pictures of friends on Facebook.  Even more reason to pick only ugly friends.  They’ll never know the difference. 

Mazda Recall:  Mazda is recalling 50,000 new cars because the cars may be full of spiders.  Frankly, I’m not so sure Mazda should have just taken Charlie Sheen’s word on that.

Ikea Under Fire:  Workers at Ikea’s US plant are criticizing the company for racial bias, an anti-union stance, forced overtime and paying extremely low wages.  Sounds like Ikea may be every bit as cheap as the furniture they sell.

http://johnnyrobish.com

One in Three Americans Have High Blood Pressure:  The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reports that nearly a third of all Americans have high blood pressure.  Which is the direct result of having to deal with the other two-thirds of Americans.

McDonald's To Open Veggie Only Outlet:  McDonald's has announced it will soon open its first veggie-only outlet in northern India.  Analysts say this move by McDonald’s will put a lot of pressure on vegetarians to open burger joints.

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