You Wear It Well: Cleaning Out My Closet

It's amazing how easy it is to leave boxes unpacked after a move. Things I thought I could never do without have miraculously remained untouched, unused, unneeded. When I moved to the Palisades, I brought with me the trappings and accoutrements of a 16-year marriage. Pots and pans, books, furniture, pictures, clothes and more than half of everything that defines a family and a life lived together. Moving all of that from a house to an apartment proved to be impractical and unwieldy, leaving me more than a little wistful and frustrated.  It's hard to start over without some breathing room.

I have a special box that I will treasure forever. In it is my wedding album, all the pre-Internet photos of my husband and I through all the happy stages of our life together, and all the cards and mementoes that will always underscore how wonderful our love and marriage used to be. No amount of time will ever change that.

Then there's everything else. The dishes, the "tchotchkes," and box after box of clothes, shoes and bags that I may have "needed" in another lifetime, but not now. Piles have grown in my limited closet space, and the clutter in my home is taking up space in my head as well.

Last week, I met Jill Alexander, creator of the Divorcee Sale. This is a bi-annual event that offers divorced women the opportunity to "shed their past," make a little money and, most importantly, contribute to The Breast Cancer Research Foundation. Women from across the country are welcoming Jill into their homes, cleaning out their closets, and donating their unwanted clothing, shoes and handbags to TDS.

I spoke to Jill about the symbolic weight of "closet cleaning," which to me has been most difficult, yet most important.  Letting go of "stuff" is never as hard as letting go of what that stuff represented. I have invited Jill to help me purge my closets next week. The thought alone makes me anxious, nervous and just a little excited. Because, of course, there is now the promise of light and open space in those closets, with room to fill them with new adventures and memories.