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Health & Fitness

Private Company to Offer Trips to the Moon

A satirical look at current events!

Private Company to Offer Trips to the Moon:  Space Adventures, the firm that already arranged for two millionaire space tourists to visit the International Space Station - is getting ready to sell trips to the moon for $100 million each.  Yea, but by the time you throw in parking and baggage fees, the trip is no longer affordable.

Ashley Judd Said to Be Pondering Senatorial Bid:   Kentucky native and actress Ashley Judd is said to be "exploring" a run for the U.S. Senate, against Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell.  Those close to McConnell say that even if Judd were to win such an election, there is very little chance McConnell would then pursue an acting career.

Plane Makes Emergency Landing After Passenger Bitten By Snake:  According to a report from an Egyptian news site, an EgyptAir flight from Cairo to Kuwait was forced to make an emergency landing after a passenger on the plane was bitten by a snake.  Officials say that after being captured, the snake began complaining about “airline food.”

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NASA Says Mercury Has Ice:  In a surprising finding, NASA scientists have confirmed that Mercury, the closest planet to the sun, has a vast amount of ice at its north pole.  Yes, but does it have any mercury?   

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Snow on Earth:  Scientists say that any given time, snow covers approximately one quarter of the surface of the earth.  And the other three-fourths is covered with Starbucks cafes.

Pope Benedict Joins Twitter:  Pope Benedict XVI has started a personal Twitter account and will send his first tweet himself, while most other tweets will be written by an aide and he will sign off on them.  In other words, “I’m the Pope and I approve this tweet.” 

Russia Panics Over Mayan Apocalypse:  Reacting to conspiracy theorists who think that the long-awaited Mayan apocalypse will come true, many Russians have begun buying supplies, building strange archways, and otherwise losing their minds.  Which begs the question, just what kind of supplies do you think you’re gonna need if the world comes to an end? 

Duchess of Cambridge is Pregnant:  Britain's Buckingham Palace announced that Prince William and the Duchess of Cambridge, Kate Middleton, are expecting.  She’s expected to give birth to an instant millionaire. 

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